And this is a lesson from someone who has experienced narcissism first hand -
HOW TO DEAL WITH A NARCISSISTIC FAMILY MEMBER
Dealing with a narcissistic parent, sibling, or relative can feel like navigating a maze with invisible walls. Trust me, I’ve been there
How do you know if a family member is narcissistic?
A family member may be narcissistic if they display consistent patterns of self-centeredness, lack of empathy, and a constant need for admiration, often at the expense of others.
Since we were young, we’ve always been taught that family is an unbreakable bond, an unwavering support system we can rely on through thick and thin.
Little did I know that my journey would take me through the unsettling terrain of dealing with a narcissistic brother
In hindsight, I can see that the signs were always there, both subtle and not-so-subtle red flags, waiting for me to see them.
Below, I’ll share those #signs :
1. He Will Try to Sabotage You for His Personal Gain
There are instances when I think my narcissistic brother hates me so much that he actively works against my success.
Whether it was undermining my opportunities or tarnishing my reputation, his actions consistently aimed to serve his interests at the expense of mine.
This behavior left me wondering if a true sibling should ever act this way.
2. His obsession with appearance was a reminder of the shallowness that can permeate relationships with narcissistic family members.
I observed that he would put on a façade of extraordinary kindness and warmth when we were in public or with friends.
But it became evident that hIs actions were driven more by a desire to maintain a certain image in front of others, rather than a genuine connection or care for anyone.
3. He Lacks Empathy Towards You and Others
Does your brother find it difficult to relate to the suffering of others?
I know from experience that it can be disheartening to cope with a brother who demonstrates a striking lack of empathy, not only towards you but also towards others.
You might’ve noticed his inability to genuinely understand or share in the emotions, experiences, or struggles of those around him including yourself.
This dearth of empathy can make you feel isolated and unheard as if your feelings were inconsequential.
It’s a painful reminder of how his self-absorption can erode the bonds of compassion within a family.
4. He’s Jealous and Envious of You and Others
Does home life with your brother feels like you’re walking on eggshells?
Living with a narcissistic jealous brother can be difficult because he struggles with envy and resentment when it comes to you and others.
5. He Always Wants Praise and Attention
A sibling with narcissistic traits often exhibits a constant need for praise and attention from everyone around.
Growing up with my brother, I’ve observed his relentless pursuit of adulation, which seems insatiable.
Especially when we’re with the rest of the family, it becomes apparent that he thrives on being the center of attention, overshadowing the accomplishments and needs of those around him.
6. He’s Manipulative and Two-Faced
Are you left feeling manipulated or controlled by his actions?
Much like my narcissistic mother, a brother displaying manipulative traits can be remarkably two-faced.
In my own encounters, I’ve experienced his ability to smoothly switch personas, using manipulation to further his own agenda.
This behavior can involve attempts to smear your reputation or undermine your credibility.
As a result, you may feel isolated and misunderstood, especially in the eyes of the rest of your family.
7. He Can’t Handle Criticism in a Healthy Way
Have you ever wondered why it’s so difficult to offer criticism to your brother? That’s because narcissists often have an inability to handle criticism in a healthy manner.
It took me a while to realize that my brother is a narcissistic person.
So, I’ve learned the hard way that offering constructive feedback can lead to defensive reactions or even hostility and real insults from him while calling your constructive feedbacks/advice insults, just like his mother even though they are the ones that really insult/demean.
I recall a specific instance when I cautiously shared my thoughts about a situation.
Instead of considering my perspective, he became defensive, abusive and hostile, making it clear that criticism was not welcome.
It became evident that, in his eyes, he may never be the one with the problem, and trying to change this dynamic often proved futile.
To avoid getting drawn into arguments, choose your battles. While constructive feedback can lead to positive change, you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change themselves.
8. He Hates Taking Accountability for His Actions
A narcissistic brother’s reluctance to take responsibility often leads to a cycle of deflection and evasion, making it challenging to address issues and find resolutions.
It’s disheartening to witness how he’s not hesitant to sacrifice your reputation to shield his own image.
I’ve seen how he’s willing to throw you under the bus, leaving little room for genuine accountability within the relationship.
9. He’s Belittling and Demeaning Toward You
Besides being self-centered, another key indicator of a narcissistic brother is his habit of belittling and demeaning those around him.
They bully, they assassinate the character of those they envy, and they often play an active role in trying to do harm to the object of their hate, even asking others to participate in this harm. These groupies who enable greater hate are often referred to as “flying monkeys”
[“flying monkeys” — a term that comes from the classic film The Wizard of Oz, during which flying monkeys do the dirty work of the Wicked Witch of the West.]
10. He Engineers Others Along With Which They All Channel Their Negative Energy Into You
Within the family unit, the outspoken child may be seen as a threat to the narcissist’s carefully constructed self-image.
Usually labeled as the problem child, they are put into a role that absorbs the family’s negative emotions and deflects attention away from the narcissist’s shortcomings.
Because of the constant scapegoating, they may internalize the negative messages they receive and develop low self-esteem, feelings of worthlessness, and self-acceptance issues.
If you’ve been labeled the scapegoat, recognize that you are not the problem. The narcissist’s behavior is the problem. Don’t let their negativity define you.
#Trauma #Abuse #SelfAbsorption #SelfCentredness #Selfishness #Jealousy #Envy #Hate #Bigotry #Psychopathy #Narcissism #Narcissists #Sadism #Egoism #Selfishness #Spitefulness #Toxicity #Wars
#Empathy #Compassion #Kindness #Love #Peace
#GenuineConnection #Awareness #Freedom #Children #Parenting #Fatherhood #Motherhood #Family #Marriages #Growth #Change #Life #World
[Part 2 of 3]
an extremely self-centered person who has an exaggerated sense of self-importance
