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The adult gender ratio in Haryana ( the state where I was born) is 879:1000 right now. Female feticide was (and is) common and normalized in the society. I hope that someday there's a wide-base research of women who were born into such places and how it utterly annihilated our childhoods. Where the boys our age were allowed to children (some of them are allowed to be children well into their 40s, actually) 1/2

Sunanda

The world looked at us girls and silently asked us "why were you allowed to be born? Your parents would be so much better off with a boy. " So we bent over backwards to prove that we were of use, that we were smart and beautiful. We had to justify being worth the effort of raising. We accommodated as we were stuffed into boxes. I for one, had no real personality till my mid-20s. I was just performing being a useful girl so that I was allowed to live. 2/2

@Theorem_Poem It's truly sad how this mentality has not changed over all these decades. I remember a friend recollecting not feeling intense happiness seeing her baby girl post delivery. She is privileged and didn't think she harbored any biases wrt gender but she felt she had disappointed her family and that affected her first response. Unconsciously women internalize Patriarchal biases even in privileged households. Deep rooted conscious unlearning is required to break these patterns.

@altlife yep! My parents were not biased whatsover and it still hurt me because the rest of my world was. Can't even imagine what its like, being unwanted in your own home.