#NovaraMedia reporting on #KidStarver's warmongering #gaslighting us into believing we are preparing for war with russia #NarcissisticAbuse
next item: a british plastic surgeon #VictoriaRose reporting directly from the only #GazaHospital ER standing, surrounded by hundreds of exclusively #GunShotWounded #Palestinians being #massacred in the biggest live #genocide ever.

#GifsArtidote: immediate #GlobalStrike #Boycott #sabotage #organise #resist
#press #news #BreakingNews
https://youtu.be/DBgIXkjPOrc?

Breaking the #traumaBond that binds you to your abuser is hard work. You literally go through the stages of grief, as part of breaking it requires you to let go of the shared delusion that your abuser is a "good person".

This means that you lose the person you thought they were. All while potentially still interacting with them. All while potentially still being subjected to their manipulations.

This is why people recommend going no contact. Healing from abuse requires you to re-center yourself in your reality, in your perception. And that results in your abuser having less control. Spoiler: they don't want that.

Talking with a #narcissist about your emotions is a pointless endeavor. Worse: it's dangerous as they'll use this information against you later.

They are not interested in finding a solution that helps all involved parties to emotionally regulate. They are interested in the solution that helps them alone emotionally regulate. Bonus points if they guilt trip you into finding that solution.

Let me be clear: if someone makes you feel guilty about your behavior while refusing to cooperate on finding a solution that works for everyone, that's manipulation. That's emotional abuse.

Someone who truly cares about you would want to resolve the issue in a way that works for both them *and* you.

You do not need permission, validation, acceptance of other people to be and love who you are.

The person closest to you is *yourself*. "Love your neighbour" is great and all but it's worthless unless you love thyself. Love yourself. Just the way you are *right now*. With all your messes, weirdness, and unresolved pain and trauma. You are worthy of love.

Healthy relationships will lift you up. They will encourage you to be who you really are. They will empower you. They won't tear you down and make you doubt yourself and your worth. People who do that don't love you. Not really. Even if they tell you differently.

Rise strong and reach for your stars. You are important. You matter. I see you.

2022, 11 days before the war.

I tried as hard as I could to concentrate on MUA and self-portrait photography. But on the 24th of February 2022 I couldn't sleep at all, reading the news all night long. Something inside me broke badly that night.

2022, 1 month before the war.

I was on my way back to my normal weight when the war started to feel closer. I still couldn't believe it was happening. Who starts wars in the XXI century? Isn't soft power a better solution? I started eating emotionally again and sleeping badly. The ADs didn't help at all.

2019-2020
It's been about 3 months since I started therapy for the anxiety and depression I've had for 15 years. A long way to go.

Here I'm still prone to anorexia, but I'm euphoric because I've regained the ability to sleep and the strength to live my life to the full.

If you can't even feel empathy for a man that was crucified on a cross for telling you to love one another, perhaps there is something wrong with you. Time for some self-reflection. Oh that's for everyone else right?

I've survived over 10 years of #narcissisticAbuse in my marriage. I've been only beginning to reclaim my reality after having lived in their reality in which I was defective, overly emotional, needy, and largely good for nothing.

Life has been overall good to me recently. I'm in a wonderful new relationship. I'm building a support network with people who genuinely care about me and my well-being. I'm learning to be more kind to myself. It's hard work but it's worth it.

Despite all of that what remains is this intangible sense of sadness. A persistent low-key melancholy. I used to be a person who genuinely believed that everyone was trying to do their best in their own unique way. That we all were in the same boat that is life and nobody, regardless of their lived experience, was trying to rock it just for their own enjoyment.

(1/2)