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i think theres an 鈥渙鈥 missing in 鈥淒iscor鈥

(the image is very wide, click on it if you only see konsole)

I definitely won鈥檛 ever forget him thanks to his little Tux watching over my digital activities.

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even ripped it apart still in class with the teacher present and threw the parts all over the class room. But I still have it, still love it and now finally proved myself worthy of it by switching to Linux. I wanted to write the teacher but I just can鈥檛 remember his name because I lost my memory for names during an Epona crash. He also taught only for a short period of time at that school so his name and email are not on the school鈥檚 website anymore. Maybe I鈥檒l find a way to contact him someday.

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Like 6 years ago, I had a maths teacher (I hate maths and am bad at it) who was very passionate about Linux and asked us if someone uses Linux. Nobody raised their hand. I had it installed but didn鈥檛 use it because gaming on Linux wasn鈥檛 in the state it鈥檚 in now and I mostly used my PC for gaming back then.

One time, he gave every single student a little foam (the Linux mascot). I was delighted and kept it on my desk ever since but it seemed that nobody else cared about it. One student

from my midi keyboard and watching some fideos and I think the former gave me an idea of how to solve the flatness issue. More learning has to wait until after Halloween.

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Halloween. It also looks like I can only get one Halloween cover done before the end of the month instead of the two I鈥檝e been looking forward to do, but that means that it鈥檒l be done in a year when it鈥檒l be much better because I鈥檒l have improved (hopefully). I鈥檓 also not happy with the way my 8-bit songs sound in general, they sound very flat without dual-channel echoes, among other things. I want to improve my FamiTracker, 8-bit and music knowledge and I already did a bit by analysing sounds

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that one done at least before the Jeff song in December but I should postpone it to next year. Making just song lyrics without it isn鈥檛 as bad as a 10-minute devupdate script. While I haven鈥檛 done these two big things on my to-do list yet, the switch to Linux along with the extensive documentation could count as a 3rd big thing, so I did get something important done.

I鈥檝e been looking forward to covering Drenched Bluff since April and it looks like I have to postpone it once more until after

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I spend almost half of this year having no fun at all and making no fideos or other creative things, after I was keeping the bi-weekly upload schedule so well. And I still haven鈥檛 made my website (that now has an exclusive article on it before it even properly exists) or the Jeff Kaplan Voice Pack鈩 with every single word Jeff has ever said exported as a separate file, tagged with what he said, tonality, volume, emotion, speed and more for easier and better Jeff sentence creation. I wanted to get

I guess this (collection of) toot(s) just unexpectedly turned into me talking about what鈥檚 on my mind after all. And into yet another example of why I need unlimited characters. I only wanted to write about this once I have my website but I just can鈥檛 stop myself once I start writing. I hope I won鈥檛 regret this. Sorry for decreasing your mood level, have a gardehug to make it up:

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connection between our minds. We constantly ask each other for advice and tell each other even small things without having to worry if the other person even cares and without not saying the truth because the other person could take it the wrong way. Well, almost always. We are also both not very experienced in expressing feelings, only that I want to change that.

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who I also care about a lot. And of course above all: that I can call Amarizo a friend. I鈥檓 as close to him as to nobody else and I wouldn鈥檛 even dare to imagine being that close to anyone else. We have no idea how it happened but I鈥檓 so happy and fortunate that it did. And it happened when I needed it the most, after my parent鈥檚 divorce and moving to a completely different place once again, as it happened every 1.5 years on average. Moving, not divorce. I feel like there is an invisible

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did with me. I鈥檓 always there for him and I want to save him from this misery but nothing I try works. Just like with her tortoises, but I at least improved their conditions to some degree after months of insisting and getting yelled at and threatened. Too late for the dead ones, though. I鈥檓 sorry. I hope you鈥檙e having a great time in pet heaven with Ness.

I will work on myself. And I have to remind myself that there actually are 1, 2 incredibly nice people who do care about my creations and

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That鈥檚 a lot of 鈥渙ne鈥漵. Just about 1, 2. The truth is that she faced similar, probably worse, conditions in her childhood. She is very unhappy herself and I feel so sorry and guilty that nothing I tried could give her the happiness and love she needs and deserves but never experienced. But even worse than that is that the same is happening to my brother, even worse because unlike me, he is just as impulsive as our mum and not as 鈥済ood鈥 at school as me which escalates things much more than they

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one as well and that she hates one so much that she wants to put one in a children鈥檚 home or mental asylum to finally get rid of one. Which leads to one trying to suppress all external signs of emotions, thoughts and existence, which leads to one鈥檚 mum telling one that one has no emotions and is therefore a heartless, cold and selfish thing that lacks the ability to feel or give love. Which couldn鈥檛 be further from the truth. I literally don鈥檛 even hurt a mosquito because I feel what they feel.

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example just tweeting out their thoughts, I find that very interesting and care about it a lot. I wish I could be like them but I just can鈥檛 get myself to believe that anyone would care about what I think. Or even tolerate my existence. I guess that鈥檚 what happens when one鈥檚 mum tells one every single day that one is the absolute worst child in existence, that all other children are so much better, that she will call all class mates and teachers to tell them how horrible one is to make them hate

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Half of my total tweets now consist of progress updates from the last 1.5 months. I love writing and hate Twitter鈥檚 character limit btw which is one of the reasons why I want to have my own website so badly (and like Mastodon). On the other hand, I never post anything anyway because I think that nobody cares about what鈥檚 on my mind and if I write something, it would just waste someone鈥檚 time and annoy them before they get to see the much more interesting post below mine. But when I see eon for

a Developer Update, except that I only had 1 night of no sleep instead of 2 in a row to get it done in time. But unlike the devupdates that nobody watches, this documentation that nobody will read could be very helpful to people and prevent them from going insane trying to solve these issues, so it definitely was worth every second. And I鈥檝e finally switched to Linux, as I鈥檝e been wanting to do for many years. I feel much more at home and in control on Linux, there鈥檚 no way I could ever go back.

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didn鈥檛 proof-read it 100 times), but it still contains useful information for people who face the same issues I did. The article鈥檚 length also illustrates why the switch took me so long. But don鈥檛 worry, you probably won鈥檛 need 95鈥% of that stuff if you use Linux. I expected this whole thing to take like 3 days or a week at most but here I am, 1.5 months later. I guess that means another 1, 2 fideos less this year. And only 1 Halloween cover. I feel as exhausted as I do after spending a month on

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