"instructions unclear, dick in toaster" is still the funniest fucking shit to me i don't care

This goes double for baby formula or diapers, but I think that goes without saying

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Nobody has ever shoplifted food and if you thought you saw someone doing it one time you were wrong and you definitely did not

Inspired by soft's find of absolutely awful shit, here's a reminder that a large portion of the Romani population consider g*psy to be a slur and that you should never use it

Me: I want to try that bacon deluxe

Wendy's: do you, though? The baconator is-

Me: the bacon deluxe is $4

Wendy's app: here's a coupon for a $5 baconator

Me:

Someone just said that they watched a memorial that heavily implied gays did 9/11, and as a person with an architectural background, who poses logical "conspiracy theories", I refuse to be grouped in the same category as those looney tunes because my theories MAKE LOGICAL SENSE

You ever look at someone who was like high key one of your closest friends and who has since made insulting your entire existence a key personality point and wonder if you actually have a judge of character or not

"wait, who unionized?"

"WOULDN'T YOU LIKE TO KNOW. PROBABLY YOUR MOM."

there are two seasons:
1) halloween
2) almost halloween

so far i've learned the ocarina songs to transport me to the myasstodon & monads temples

the Requiem of Ass & Bolero of Cancel respectively

maybe if our society could provide housing for its citizens, one of the most basic functions of a society, we wouldnt have to make all public space hostile and uncomfortable so that rich people aren't reminded of their greed and failure? just a thought

If you talk about poor families being spoiled by being able to eat and have basic necessities like healthcare, water/heat/power/internet, I am legally allowed to shoot you dead in the face under divine law and also a very generous interpretation of 1970s US naval code

I'm trying to decide if I like Stargirl or if it's just superhero mental pork rinds until Disney remembers how to make good TV again because that episode missed the mark.

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